You may already follow us on social media, but we have a newer way to interact with us on our Sub-Reddit. By joining, you can talk to us, post on it, and get exclusive updates and insights. We want to increase the number of ways for you to follow us! I’ve added a Sub-Reddit because it allows us to foster a community and interact more. Many of you are already fans of Reddit, and we hope you will go over and join and have fun.

Join the UNB Blog, Store, and Podcast Sub-Reddit

We had Adam Jaxon on the Brief Talk After Dark podcast a few weeks ago. I had so much fun talking to him and he suggested the next time we do something do a live stream and take questions and “callers.” We decided to do a Twitter Space on Sept 18th at 9 PM eastern. I can’t guarantee I will record the space, but I plan on trying to do it.

We are open to any questions you guys have about spicy content creation, underwear, modeling, gogo dancing and more. Adam is an open book and we want to have fun on this Space. Join us on Twitter under my handle @unbtim

Over the past few months, I’ve been reflecting on the importance of community-building, especially in the world of underwear, spandex, lingerie, and kink. One thing that stands out is the lack of spaces where people with similar interests can connect and build genuine friendships. There are too few opportunities for people to unite over their shared love of underwear or gear, whether online or in person.

My blog and podcast have allowed me to share my passion for men’s underwear and gear for years. However, I’ve realized that it’s more than just about the latest trends—it’s about fostering a community where people can feel comfortable and supported in their interests. Through the podcast, I’ve started to open up more about my personal journey, allowing listeners to get to know the person behind the platform. This shift has made the podcast not only a space to discuss underwear but also a way for me to connect with like-minded individuals.

The Power of Friendship in Niche Communities

One of my biggest goals is to build more friendships with people who share our deep love for underwear and gear. We all want friends who understand this side of us and who feel just as passionate about it. Finding people who don’t judge you for leaving a pair of thongs or bikinis lying around or genuinely appreciating your love for a particular brand or style can be challenging.

At this stage in my life, I’m not looking for casual flings like I did in the past. I’m searching for real friendships based on shared interests, where we can support one another and talk openly about things like underwear without feeling awkward or embarrassed.

The Challenges of Making Friends in an Online World

As I’ve navigated the world of online communities, I’ve noticed how hard it can be to form genuine connections. Many platforms are more geared toward hookups, making it difficult to build friendships. I’ve changed my approach to how I engage with people online. I no longer post to find a hookup; instead, I’m focused on forming friendships with people who share my passion. For instance, I’ve found that it’s easy to misinterpret someone’s intentions when they reach out online, leading to misunderstandings and missed opportunities for friendship.

I’ve found genuine compliments on people’s appearance, style, or confidence go a long way. Instead of comments focused on someone’s physical attributes, I prefer to say things like, “That color looks great on you” or “You look so confident in that outfit.” These compliments help people feel more comfortable and open to starting a conversation.

A More Inclusive and Welcoming Community

Over the last few years, I’ve met some fantastic people who have shown me that you can’t judge a book by its cover. Some of the most handsome and fit guys I’ve met are the sweetest and most supportive people. This realization has made me even more passionate about creating a community that welcomes people of all sizes, colors, and backgrounds.

It’s essential to break down the stigma surrounding underwear and gear, starting with more open conversations. Whether on my podcast or through my online connections, I want to create a space where people feel comfortable, encouraged, and empowered to talk about their interests without fear of judgment.

How Do You Build Friendships in the Underwear Community?

I’m still on this journey of finding and building more friendships within the underwear and gear community, and I’d love to hear from you. Your experiences, your successes, and your strategies all matter. How do you go about making friends who share your love for underwear? Where have you found the most success in connecting with like-minded individuals? I want to know what works for you because your input strengthens our community.

If you have thoughts or ideas on fostering community in this space, please comment, email, or DM me. Let’s continue this conversation and work together to create a more supportive and connected community. I’m eager to hear about your experiences and learn from your insights. Together, we can make this community even more inclusive and welcoming.

Wrapping It Up

Ultimately, the most important takeaway is that building friendships based on shared interests like underwear and gear can be deeply fulfilling. As I continue to work on the podcast and expand my network, I want to create a space where people feel supported, confident, and free to be themselves. It’s not just about the underwear—it’s about the friendships we form along the way.

Let’s start making more meaningful connections and build a community that embraces everyone, no matter what style of underwear or gear they love.

Let’s talk about masculinity. In our ongoing series on masculinity and underwear, I wanted to discuss whether there are rules in men’s underwear. It goes without saying that for most people, especially in the United States, men are expected to wear certain types of underwear. Looking at our media and everything, you see guys in TV movies, usually in boxers, boxer briefs, or trunks. Rarely do you see briefs unless it’s a joke, and if you see thongs, it’s either a stripper or a joke. It’s time we sit down and talk about the rules of underwear in the US.

First off, I think that there should be no rules for underwear. It should be up to the person wearing it to determine what they like, want to wear, and what is off-limits to them. I don’t think it’s up to anyone else in society or anywhere else to determine what is considered “masculine” and what is not. That’s a big problem right now because we have many straight readers who don’t show their underwear, and we have gay readers, too, who won’t go to the gym wearing something other than compression gear or bare black trunks. They won’t wear a bikini, jock, or thong because they don’t want the attention.

I’ve worn thongs to the gym, and I’ve worn bikinis. I never really think about it; it’s just my underwear. It didn’t hit me until I was talking to someone who said they would never wear a thong or bikini to the gym. It blew me away because it never crossed my mind in my many years of wearing underwear. It doesn’t bother me to be seen in underwear if I drop my pants or something; it’s just natural and normal to me. But it’s different for most guys who are not reading this blog or listening to our podcast. It’s time we change that because guys shouldn’t have to stress about what they will wear to the doctor or the gym.

We need to let guys focus on who they are. I think, for a large portion of guys out there, especially straight guys, they’re not able to explore underwear the way a lot of gay guys have over the years. Being gay, underwear, to me, goes hand in hand. It’s something I enjoy and a way to express myself further. I always associated it with my sexual identity. You see a hot guy in underwear, and you’re like, “Ooh, whatever your definition of a hot guy is.” It’s ingrained, and when I date someone, I buy them underwear. I don’t think a lot of straight guys have that experience coming of age and discovering underwear. It happens, but it’s not as open and accessible as it is in the gay community. However, that’s changing. In the last couple of years, many straight guys have come forward, sending emails and commenting about how much they love underwear. Many have hidden it, but they’re not hiding it anymore.

We have John on the podcast, whose wife loves him differently. That’s so great to hear, and it sends me over the moon that women are enjoying the sexier side of underwear. I think the whole masculinity thing plays into it because a lot of people get hung up on the idea that “you have to be this kind of masculine man.” There are no rules about masculinity anymore. You get to be whoever you want to be. Today, guys are wearing nail polish, which they didn’t do ten years ago, and some are starting to wear makeup. It doesn’t matter anymore, especially to the younger generations. Unfortunately, the older generations I’m part of get hung up on things. But if you enjoy it, you’re not hurting anyone, and everyone’s consenting, do you? I may not like it, it may not be for me, but I’m not going to condemn you for doing it.

We’re seeing more guys step out of the masculinity box. Men in lingerie have taken off around the same time, maybe a little after thongs. Guys are wearing lace, stockings, and all sorts of things. This isn’t about cross-dressing; it’s just about wearing something different. There are several guys I follow online who exclusively wear lingerie, and they love it. They look fantastic in it, and I’m so happy these guys are wearing it, putting themselves out there, and enjoying this side of themselves that society says they should not want. It’s just an article of clothing; it won’t make you gay or transgender. It’s just you expressing who you are, which is the most fantastic thing.

We all need to rebel against toxic masculinity. We need to reject the notion that you can only be a man if you wear boxers or boxer briefs and that no self-respecting man would wear thongs. That’s all BS. We need to stand up together and start embracing what we love. I built UNB on the idea that it’s for every guy, not just gay guys. I consciously made an effort back in the day to attract straight guys to read my blog, and it happened. Everyone told me I was crazy, but it happened. Now, more guys are coming around because I wanted to share my love for underwear. They’re listening to the podcast. I’m amazed by the guys who comment on how they relate to the stories we discuss, hearing us talk about things on their minds, things they don’t have someone to talk to about. It’s incredible.

Guys, we all need to start talking about underwear. Say what you like with friends and in public if you’re bold. Just be yourself, and don’t give a fuck if someone doesn’t like it. I’ve gone out with people who preferred me in something other than a bikini, jock, or thong—whatever I was going to wear—and wanted me in something more masculine. That’s a deal breaker for me. If you try to change my underwear, I give you the finger, and I’m out. I’ve lived too long to be who I am to change for someone else. You cannot ask someone else to change who they are. Underwear is ingrained in my DNA, and I am not giving that up for anyone. I would rather be single than have to give up my underwear, and you know, I’m happy being single.

So, I hope you guys will spread the word that masculinity should not play a factor or have rules in your underwear world. It would help if you enjoyed it. Step out of your comfort zone every so often. Try something new that you would never have tried before. I’ve discovered so many things that way, especially with the blog, that I never would have considered, but after trying it, I was like, “Oh my God, this is amazing.” We all must look at new things objectively and not just judge them. You may not like it, and that’s fine. No one has to enjoy everything in underwear. But if you keep trying and exploring, you’ll have a fantastic underwear life. And that’s what we’re all after. So, again, don’